‘My intention from now on is to expand my awareness of what is truly possible right NOW!’

Feeling much relief and an acceptance that my ‘breast experience’ is NOT who I am and only a physical manifestation of what I had been thinking and feeling in the past, I have reframed this issue as an experience in dying to myself, [my body]…in order to be IN the world…but not OF it.  I cannot tell you how many times I have read or heard that statement, yet it really never quite sank in. I can tell you that NOW it has sunk in and the mere feeling of that thought brings me immense joy and heartfelt emotions as I dissolve into ONENESS with all things.

I am grateful that I attracted a compassionate surgeon who is willing to accept my decisions of what I truly want for my body. I am grateful to experience our health system and feel in some small way I awakened the hospital staff by being in the present moment in watching the movie as it was felt by them, while my faith that this was just an early experience allowed me to remain unattached to a specific outcome.

I am grateful to the other surgeon for allowing me to share with her my opinion of why mammograms don’t always work and that without the radiologist being present to actually see the ultra-sound, they reported to me that nothing was wrong even though they did it twice. I am grateful to my family and friends far and near for their love and support. I am grateful to have the money to pay cash for my surgery as it is not covered by insurance. At first I was upset because most of my life I have not had health insurance and now that I am of age to possibly benefit from Medicare guess what?  Medicare does not pay for this type of surgery, because it is “elective.”

I am ASKING the Universe to have them pay to remove the implants as they are a detriment to my health; knowing maybe they will and maybe they won’t. I will continue to hold the energy and trust that regardless of what happens, it is for my highest good, and the good of all.

In my work as a radical forgiveness coach I not only suggest to my clients, but I use it all the time for myself, and that is to use the radical forgiveness worksheet, one of the best tools for making a shift in consciousness about an upset. (By the way, there is one free to download on my website). I have used plenty of these worksheets in working through my personal upsets, big or small and when finished with them, I tear them up and throw them away because I am done with that issue and grounded in the Truth of WHAT IS and healed from it.  Many times what is bothering us is not really what we are mad or angry about, this worksheet empowers you by helping you to see the underlying issue and shifts your perceptions revealing the initial thought that put you into the victim role, in the first place!  Easy to do and fast!

In dealing with my recent relationship breakup I experienced much anger, which I feel attracted to my physical body the manifestation of a rupture in my breast. Did I attract it? Yes, I did. It has been researched and proven by Quantum Physics that our thoughts are like magnets and that like attracts like. Did I intentionally attract it? No, I did not. But I did ASK to raise my vibration above these earthly experiences so that I can live a more peaceful life, grow spiritually and be of better service to others. I am grateful that I was able to walk through that break-up with grace and love, walking my talk in seeing my former partner as my healing angel and practicing self forgiveness again. However, I am human and I did have my moments of ego driven anger, pain, self-pity, and despair.  With all said and done, I am clear that I have attracted all this for my own spiritual growth and I am grateful for all these experiences and opportunities to raise my vibration so that I can better assist others in raising the consciousness of our planet. For deeper understanding on the principles of Radical Forgiveness, please go to my website, www.lifeworks-marketing.com.

By using the Law of Attraction and the radical forgiveness tools, I easily attracted the perfect plastic surgeon and have surgery scheduled on December 2nd. I am at peace and open to infinite possibilities. I hope you are too.

We have no idea how powerful our thoughts and words really are. We actually have no idea what powerful beings we are. That realization alone leads to the awareness of our thoughts and deliberately choosing to change them for our highest good and the highest good for others involved in our life. What we think today creates our tomorrow! Stop a moment and just let that sink in. What are you thinking about? Are you hooked into the drama that ‘seems’ to be happening all around you? Do you feel like your life is just a random set of circumstances? I am here to remind you that it is not, YOU are a powerful being and life IS purposeful.  Peace be with you.

Dear Ones,

These are the chronicles of my recent experience in discovering a lump in my breast. I share these with you, trusting that you, my readers, will find your own revelations for your own personal journey. [To comment or enter into discussion, scroll down to the end of this blog, find the word Comments and click for comment window.]
–In Love, Carol

I thought getting through my journey to myself via love lost would provide me rest and peace…and it has, but now I realize it was just the beginning of more to come.

Tuesday – Discovery

Nevertheless, my surprise was not diminished when, last Tuesday, I discovered a lump on my right breast about the size of a quarter. It was only visible when I pushed the breast to the left and was near my cleavage and heart. Imagine that, near my heart!!!

Thursday – Denying

I denied it for two days, knowing that each morning when I awoke it would be gone. But it was not…so by Thursday I accepted it. I called and made an appointment with my general physician.

Friday- Facing the Breast-seeing the Bigger Picture- Releasing & Accepting the ISness

Then on Friday morning, I knew I had to tell my daughters; but when I began mentally and visually rehearsing my upcoming conversation with them, I lost it.
I cried all morning and could not work or talk to anyone.
I cried and cried.
I got mad.
I had my own pity party.
I told the universe I did not want this.
I did not want to deal with this.
I take very good care of my body and I love my breasts.
I deserved a rest–and on and on. . .
Then I sat in the silence for several hours crying ever so softly when Ginger [my canine companion] came to comfort me and I awakened to the higher purpose.
Realizing my attachment to my body; recognizing I am NOT my body

. . .the AWARENESS that my mission to transform the planet means I must first transform ME crystallized.

Then I remembered my feeling about assisting in the healing of the veterans who I may be working with and how I had questioned if I was ready for that undertaking and how it actually had scared me.

It occurred to me that I might be able to die to the body BEFORE my physical death!

What IF that was it? I felt confident that this lump was not going to take me down, God would not have brought me this far to let that happen. I also am confident that NO-THING can harm me and ALL issues are FOR me.

What better thing to wake me up than my own body!

What a gift I am being given… can I step aside myself and watch this journey, much like I do when I go to the movie?

I CAN and YOU bet I CAN.

I am now excited, what a gift for my own daughters to witness this and for them to have a perfect, very close to home example of how their mother walks though not being fooled by the ‘appearance of things’, steadily having the faith of her power within, surrendering to ‘What IS’ and not being attached to an outcome.

And what a gift for the girls to pass on to their children and on to their children and so it goes, generation after generation…perhaps this is what many are talking about of the new way of being in the World.

Monday -Mammories are made of this -
On Monday I went to the doctor and she said it is very ‘fluid’, no kidding her very words..imagine fluid-moving easily and effortlessly! She referred me on to a female surgeon for a biopsy with an appointment for next Tuesday.

The girls are doing well with the news, with my youngest having the most difficulty as she is young, fearful and is very conditioned by the illusion of our medical society.

I am loved and supported by so many that I feel blessed beyond measure.
This is going to be an interesting journey as they ALL are.

When I called the surgeon, her receptionist asked me if my physician was sending over the mammogram film and. . . I said, “No I have never had nor do I want a mammogram, I have a lump and already know it is some kind of mass.” Then she ask me how old I was and when was my last mammogram. . .I had to repeat myself as I told her again, “I’ve never had one.” I could hear her gasp through the phone.

Then she told me the doctor does not take patients who do not have a mammogram and so I said to her, “Are you telling me that Dr. M will not see me?”

She did not answer but gave me an appointment. WOW!!

This should be really interesting don’t you feel?

Wednesday – Using Intuition and being supported

Changes are wonderful and each day brings such delicious support and love from other angels. I am one lucky soul to be so blessed!

I called a dear friend who earlier this year had the experience of a diagnosis of breast cancer and who is like minded about doing these types of things the ‘natural’ way. I shared with her how I was feeling a little unsettled with Dr. M and her staff and she gave me a referral and stated, ‘she is very kind and listens’. So I cancelled my appointment with Dr. M and surprisingly to me never even ask me why I cancelled. I hung up and immediately called Dr. N office, her nurse explained to me in great detail and understanding why Dr. N wanted a mammogram–for better evaluation before my appointment with her. [It seems to be common practice and part of our health care system] So I decided to work with the system and she referred me to St. David’s Women’s Center, where, she said, they are the gentlest and most prompt in getting the results to the doctors.

Thursday – Choosing a-Breast Reframe

To mentally prepare myself for my ‘Looking a-Breast’ experience, I decided to have fun with this experience. Knowing that I am NOT my body, as I sometimes call it ‘my vehicle’ because as consciousness, I just live in IT. My intent was to witness this experience…to be in it but not OF it, much like when we go to the movies. So I dressed by body vehicle for the day, put my body vehicle in my car vehicle and was off to the movies at St. David’s, expectant and excited about my day. Upon arrival, I disrobed by body vehicle and was greeted by a lovely lady dressed in purple who did my mammogram. Then I was put in a waiting room and very shortly a nice young lady came and told me she was going to do a ultra-sound. Then I went back to the waiting room, the lady in purple came and said they needed another picture of the breast in question, then back to the waiting room, then the nice young lady came and said she needed to do another ultra-sound. Not at all upset or concerned that anything was ‘wrong’ out of curiosity I ask why so many repeats of the same thing. I was told it was for purposes of being through because I had never had a mammogram for comparison of the tissues. The young lady that did the ultra-sound ask me what I did for a living and when I shared with her my take on this experience….and especially that no matter What the Outcome…I did not have NO-thing wrong, I am just having an experience, she said wide-eyed…Oh my..THAT is SO deep! She made sure to get my business card. Then I was told I could get dressed and wait for the results.

I was told that they could not find anything…no cancer, no cyst, no nothing. I ask about my implants and was told they were intact. It was suggested I see my doctor and come back for a mammogram in six months. My response was Whoopee! Thank you living loving God. I was thrilled and excited to share the good news. It even occurred to me that I did not need to go further with this experience.

I shared the good news with family and friends had fun talking about the experience. Everyone was delighted, one of my dear friend and mentors cautioned me that she felt it was a ruptured implant as she had experience much the same -it not showing up in her mammogram either. I decided to keep my appointment with the surgeon for the next week.

Wednesday of the following week – NO-Thing is disguised as Silicon

As soon as Dr. N felt the lump she said it was silicon and proceeded to do an ultra-sound to confirm it. She even showed me pictures that made no sense to me. When I ask her that I had two ultra-sounds done at St. D and them not telling me only that there was nothing, she ask if the radiologist was present when they did the ultra-sound. ‘No’, I told her. She told me it was because they are looking for cancer or tissue deformities…go figure!!! They knew I had implants and I told them I thought it might be a rupture. She stated, she would talk to ‘them’ about that. It was then that I shared with her that by having a mammogram only confirmed my belief that it does not give you true results and it does give you radiation-one of the causes of cancer. I offered her a book written by Dr. Matthias Rath who says cancer can be eradicated with proper cellular nutrients. The best breast test is the human touch…by me or a physician. She referred me on to a Plastic Surgeon as she only deals with breast cancer. I marched my body vehicle right out of there, put it in my car vehicle and brought myself some ice cream. YUM…life is really good when you are not attached!

To be continued-I am researching and interviewing Plastic Surgeons for new TaTa’s